Moratorium on the Taser gun: police should use the lasso

Following the recent deadly tragedies involving the use of Taser gun by police, the U.S. Dept of Homeland Security will impose a moratorium on the use of the Taser gun. As a replacement for the Taser gun, the DHS will suggest to the law enforcement agencies to use the lasso instead.

Here's what the Secretary of Homeland Security had to say in his report and recommendations : "The lasso may seem obsolete. But we must remember that in the past, many sheriffs have used this method to catch famous criminals. Besides, the lasso is harmless, nobody can be killed by being caught by a rope."

The Secretary also mentioned that he saw many lasso specialists at the latest western festival of San Antonio,Texas. He was surprised that these modern-day cowboys can also easily capture a rabid beef. As the Secretary added: “… if a bull in rut, weighting more than 5000 pounds can be controlled by a lasso, a bastard of 250 pounds on the crack may well be also stopped by a lasso.”

The Secretary concluded in his release by saying that these experts with the lasso met at the western festival will be able to ensure the training of police officers. The first officers who will be able to use the lasso should be ready by February 2008. Stay tuned.